A continuation of my incredibly vain, nearly impossible bucket list. Read the first entry here:
- Have a child just so I can ask RuPaul to be their Godmother. That’s it. That’s the only reason.
- Speak at a comic-con panel with fellow writer Mairghread Scott where we will talk about feminism, differing views on action movies, and dim sum.
- Get a fancy globe thing that holds whiskey and/or opens a secret staircase.
- Have my body be the standard ideal so I don’t have to work out anymore.
- Sing with Beyoncé, because we are pretty tight and it was her idea to invite me on stage.
- Be so important that Pandora just KNOWS that yes, I am still listening.
- Successfully recreate the photo of that chick on the right side of my blog that looks NOTHING like me.
- Win an award that’s on national TV so I can thank Ben Affleck for “personal reasons.”
- Write a hit song but tell no one until I need to seek revenge.
- Adapt East Of Eden into a screenplay that is a little closer to the original story and then play Cate and PULL IT OFF.
- Suddenly be really good at impressions.
- Completely understand how the game of football is played.
- Join Anthony Bourdain on his Parts Unknown series for a tour of Colorado. And Chicago.
- Win Trivial Pursuit just once.
- Write a blog post/email/script without one single typo.
- Star in a holiday movie that’s a huge hit and is watched by families year after year.
- Be the first name to show up on google when someone types Alison and even Allison for people who don’t know how to spell my first name correctly.
- Cry on cue.
- Hire movers when I move to a slightly bigger place. So, that’s like two.
- Write a book with John Green to help get him out of his rut.
- Get to be in a movie that is filmed in Europe and is full of British people.
- Just, like, know Chris Pratt. Like, “Oh hey Chris.” “Tafel! Get over here! Give me a hug.” “Oh, okay…”
- Inspire someone who has never voted to vote.
- Tell the story of Baby Doe Tabor on an episode of Drunk History.
- Be in a professional photo shoot that is not an ad for a park or from a kiosk in the mall.
- Just be able to wail on the guitar like a boss.
- Remember how to tap dance real good.
- Never get sick again.
- Have a nook somewhere.
- Meet the first woman president of the United States next year.
– One L
“Whenever I want you all I have to do is…” – Everly Bros